CFC Top 5 Worst transfers

Giving it some thought, this is harder to answer than I initially expected.

The notoriously expensive (in contemporary context) disasters often have caveats; Torres scored a decisive goal in the Europa League Final, and was part of our first Champions League-winning squad, and not to mention scored that goal against Barcelona. Kepa was also part of a Europa League-winning side, and has provided a number of memorable moments in penalty shoot-outs (including one against Tottenham in a League Cup semi). Most of the egregiously overpriced squad players who turned out to be sh*te didn't actually impact the squad all that negatively and barely presented a drop in the ocean financially or in terms of overall negative impact. (Veron, Drinkwater, Rahman, etc.) Even Shevchenko scored that belter against Tottenham!

The world in which we have existed for the past two decades has made it hard for an individual signing to be all that harmful. Should Tiemoué Bakayoko and Danny Drinkwater prove to be 70 million pounds' worth of idiot, an über-wealthy club can simply spend a further 90 million pounds on Jorginho and Mateo Kovačić the following summer and immediately rectify the problem. What does it matter if Juan Cuadrado doesn't work out straight away when six months later you can go out and buy Pedro Rodriguez? After our two worst transfer windows in recent memory we've finished 10th and 5th; on each occasion, the following season we have qualified for the Champions' League and won a major trophy.

While it is tempting to shrug and simply pick five expensive players I don't like, I think the most harmful transfers would have to come from before a time in which we have so much money that potential negative impact is almost entirely mitigated. I'm in my thirties so have only ever known a Chelsea in the top flight, and even as a kid we were in a position to sign Chris Sutton for £10m, realise he's sh*t, sign Ballon d'Or winner George Weah on loan in January to cover the remainder of the season, win the FA Cup and finish in the quarter-finals of the Champions' League, then spend £15m on Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink the following summer. Realistically the answer to this question came during a time when the stakes were far higher, and the club wasn't in a position to simply spend their way out of trouble, i.e. before I was born.

 
Of course there are other metrics one could use (e.g. return on investment) but frankly I think the previous post was quite serious enough.

Alternatively, I could in fact give into temptation, shrug, and come up with my completely arbitrary list which is definitely well-considered and not just the first five dumb jokes which came into my head:

1) Kevin De Bruyne - a fantastic player for our direct rivals who has scored against us. The only legitimate part of the bizarre vendetta against José which doesn't include the word 'Tottenham'.

2) Mohamed Salah - this should have been the moment when we finally eschwed our 'signing players who score against us in the Champions' League' policy. A fantastic player for our direct rivals who has scored against us.

3) Thibaut Courtois - enormous bellend. Also shagged De Bruyne's missus or something (possibly vice versa). Hopefully cried when he conceded a goal to Timo Werner.

4) Frank Lampard - was ultimately too good. Responsible for a fanbase full of entitled cry babies. Publicly mentioned that voted Conservative.

5) Michy Batshuayi - inexplicably cost more than N'Golo Kanté despite being signed in the same transfer window. I have never, nor will I ever understand the obsession with Spongebob Squarepants. If you are an adult the only acceptable cartoon is King of the Hill, or episodes of the Simpsons which were released when you were of cartoon-watching age. If you are a nerd you can watch Futurama I suppose, or if self-loathing Bojack Horseman. Oh, he did score that goal against West Brom which won us the title though. Never kicked a cat though.

Pending: Romelu Lukaku - I shall wait until the end of the season...

 
For me I will go with most disappointing in terms of a player I rated and/or had high hopes for and ultimately they were a big let down.

5. Brian Laudrup - came from Rangers as a well established international os some skills and effectiveness. Within months he gets home sick despite being in the UK for years and sods off.

4. Gabrielle Ambrosetti - was labeled the Italian Ryan Giggs, boy did you fool me with that Luca...

3. Chris Sutton - I was actually at the time excited for this transfer and felt he would have a mix of everything we needed bar electric pace for our front man. So bad that we used him in defense before sending him to Celtic.

2. Adrian Mutu - coming from Francos former side and having red a bit on him and watched videos this guy seemed to have a fair bit of magic about him. Unfortunate the only "magic" he was interested in was qhat he shoved up his nose.

1. Shaun Wright-Philips - Back before City were mega money and we could sign top players from them. I thought SWP had everything needed to become truly special for us but he turned out to be a bang average player that never got closed to the hype.

 
1. Winston Bogarde = Wasted money paying him to sit on the sidelines because he refused to leave after he was deemed surplus to requirements by Ranieri.

2. Romelu Lukaku = For the price we paid, a horrible signing with what he said off the pitch and he's produced very little on the pitch.

3. Adrian Mutu = Tested positive for cocaine. Still owes the club 17m Euros for damages.

4. Tiemoue Bakayoko = Still have nightmares of his performance against Watford (4-1 loss) a few years ago.

5. Danny Drinkwater = Never rediscovered his good form from his Leicester days.

 
The notoriously expensive (in contemporary context) disasters often have caveats; Torres scored a decisive goal in the Europa League Final, and was part of our first Champions League-winning squad, and not to mention scored that goal against Barcelona.
Torres' performances in the Europa League in 2013 were underrated. Played a pivotal role not only in the final but in the lead up to it as well.

The goal at the Camp Nou goes without saying. Will forever go down in history...

 
Think if we are just talking transfers of any era...

worst 4 have to be our transfer outs:

1) Jimmy Greaves age 21
2) Kevin De Bruyne age 23
3) Arjen Robben age 23
4) Mo Salah age 23

5) Rom Lukaku in -
 
Torres' performances in the Europa League in 2013 were underrated. Played a pivotal role not only in the final but in the lead up to it as well.

The goal at the Camp Nou goes without saying. Will forever go down in history...
Torres put the fancy icing on the cake but it was actually Bosingwa that made the contribution (a interception that prevented a 2 on 1 vs Cech) moments before that stopped us going out.

I'll give you the Europa run but him being considered the hero of the night at the Nou Camp doesn't sit right with me atall.

 
we were in a position to sign Chris Sutton for £10m, realise he's sh*t, sign Ballon d'Or winner George Weah on loan in January to cover the remainder of the season, win the FA Cup and finish in the quarter-finals of the Champions' League, then spend £15m on Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink the following summer. 
I think we spent £12m on signing JFH and a further £4m on signing some Icelandic bloke Eidur something or other from Bolton. 

 
Torres put the fancy icing on the cake but it was actually Bosingwa that made the contribution (a interception that prevented a 2 on 1 vs Cech) moments before that stopped us going out.

I'll give you the Europa run but him being considered the hero of the night at the Nou Camp doesn't sit right with me atall.
Absolutely. Just like with the Gronkjaer goal v Liverpool, his goal in the Nou Camp did not put us through. Ramires' wonder goal put us ahead on away goals. Torres just meant we could enjoy the last few seconds.

 
I recall we were under pressure until Torres's' goal, makes him a hero for me along with a number of others.

We could have conceded late and lost in ET or on penalties.

 
I recall we were under pressure until Torres's' goal, makes him a hero for me along with a number of others.

We could have conceded late and lost in ET or on penalties.
Every player involved in the CL final wins are hero's, none of them a failed to do their duty, and collectively became champions of Europe. Thats why Torres is not on my list, i couldn't do it.

 
Every player involved in the CL final wins are hero's, none of them a failed to do their duty, and collectively became champions of Europe. Thats why Torres is not on my list, i couldn't do it.
Always felt Torres was trying just some inner torment he couldn't reconcile.

 
I recall we were under pressure until Torres's' goal, makes him a hero for me along with a number of others.

We could have conceded late and lost in ET or on penalties.
What would have happened if Torres didn't score is debatable, however there's little doubt what would have happened if Bosingwa didn't intercept that through ball with two Barca player's clean through behind him.

I'm not saying Torres doesn't deserve credit for the composure late on but it wasn't a contribution that directly prevented elimination, Ramires' goal was as what Bosingwa's interception or Cech's gazillion saves.

 
What would have happened if Torres didn't score is debatable, however there's little doubt what would have happened if Bosingwa didn't intercept that through ball with two Barca player's clean through behind him.

I'm not saying Torres doesn't deserve credit for the composure late on but it wasn't a contribution that directly prevented elimination, Ramires' goal was as what Bosingwa's interception or Cech's gazillion saves.
For sure they were key moments in the game. 

All the defenders that stood in when Terry was sent off and missed the final also deserve recognition too considering the opposition. 

Great team spirit. 

 
I recall we were under pressure until Torres's' goal, makes him a hero for me along with a number of others.

We could have conceded late and lost in ET or on penalties.
Not possible. Couldn't have gone to ET or pens because they hadn't scored an away goal and we had. Obviously Torres's goal sealed the win but it was Ramires's goal that put us through.

 
For sure they were key moments in the game. 

All the defenders that stood in when Terry was sent off and missed the final also deserve recognition too considering the opposition. 

Great team spirit. 
Understatement! It was an incredible effort by our 10 men to keep them out.

 
Veron - One mediocre season and then impossible to get rid of.
Torres - A few important goals, but otherwise absolutely awful
Bakayoko - The less said the better
Drinkwater - What were we thinking? (Or drinking)
Lukaku - 100m down the drain to make us a worse team

Special shoutout for the OG of terrible transfers: Winston Bogarde
 
2026 edition, based on pure cost at the time, and impact.

  1. Lukaku
  2. Mudryk
  3. Bakayoko
  4. Felix
  5. Lavia
 
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We spent £70m on Kepa when in all reality we couldn’t have done any worse using any GK we had in our youth ranks.

Hate that man.

 
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