The Greatest football chant/song ever

[SydneyChelsea]

Hey! Lofty- thanks for the idea

 

[SydneyChelsea]

PS. one of my favourites was the Gianfranco Zola chant to the tune of "Lola"- that was fantastic.

 

[Valerie]

II'd better be careful here, at the CSR piss-up I only had to mention the 'Auschwitz' song and Valerie was instantly convinced that I was a Nazi!

So, at the risk of Valerie believing me to be a mad axeman, here's one of my favourite songs

Actually, I was shocked at the song's cavalier attitude towards the death camps. Perhaps that's because Britain wasn't occupied during WWII and therefore hasn't witnessed, as people like my parents have, classmates, friends, neighbours, etc. being deported, never to return.

PS I don't believe you're a mad axeman at all. I KNOW you're mad axeman

 

[BLUENUT]

But seriously ...

The one that always sent shivers up my spine was the Amazing Grace Chelsea cbant.

Che-el-sea ... Che-el-sea ... Chelsea Chelsea

Che-el-sea ... Che-el-sea ... Chelsea

That's gotta be my favourite Chelsea one, with everyone pointing in unison. Someother that have comic value are:

Manu.

Park Park wherever you maybe,

he eats dogs in his own country,

butit could be worse,

he could be a scouse,

eating rats in a council house.

Or

Spuds.

He shoots, he scores,

He eats labradores,

Yi ping Lee, Yi ping Lee

For spontaneity, when we played Liverpool a few years back and they hit the side netting, they thought they'd scored and the whole MH end stood up singing to the tune of pompey chimes ' Calm down - Calm down, Calm down - Calm down.

Also the lets all do a Seaman after the Nayem goal

 

[loz]

You are a Scouser,

An ugly Scouser,

You're only happy,

On Giro day.

Your mum's out thieving,

Your dad's drug-dealing,

So please don't take my hubcaps away.

 

[Lofty]

How can anyone forget the late, great Mickey Greenaway ..

ZIGGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

ZAGGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

ZIGGA ZAGGA ZIGGA ZAGGA OI OI OI

OH WHEN THE BLUES

OH WHEN THE BLUES

GO MARCHING IN

GO MARCHING IN

OH WHEN THE BLUES GO MARCHING IN

I WANT TO BE IN THAT NUMBER

OH WHEN THE BLUES GO MARCHING IN

OI OI

 

[loz]

Far be it from me to give credit to the gooners but I did hear this sung by them (to the tune of My Old man's a Dustman)

Malcolm Glazer's Magic,

He wears a pirate's hat,

And when he saw United,

He said "I'm having that!"

He borrowed lots of money,

From lots of US banks,

But he's going to get it back

By ripping off the Mancs.

 

[just]

In the darkest side of LiverpoolWhere the Mile End's never been

Lies a chewed up body of a Scouse git

Where the North Stand's kicked him in

To hell with Liverpool

To hell with Man City

Cos we will fight, fight fight for the Ch-e-el-sea

Til we win the Football League

Christ Lofty, it's been a long, long while since I've heard that one. Sung to the tune of United States Marines. Slight difference on the first line. I remember it as:

"On the cold, dark streets of Liverpool"

BY the way mate I noticed your White Wall reference in another thread. The WW was my Shed section as well. I'm sure we've met each other in the old days and that you were familiar with all the faces from the Ruislip/Northolt crew who we used to meet up there. Was you an old King's Head regular in the distant past, before it went all Australian and poncey ?

Anyways, back to football chants. For sheer spontaneity and humour you'll have to go a long way to beat the "we've got Abramovich, you've got a drunken bitch" chant sung at Delia when she came on the pitch pissed up at half-time.

 

[Lofty]

"On the cold, dark streets of Liverpool"BY the way mate I noticed your White Wall reference in another thread. The WW was my Shed section as well. I'm sure we've met each other in the old days and that you were familiar with all the faces from the Ruislip/Northolt crew who we used to meet up there. Was you an old King's Head regular in the distant past, before it went all Australian and poncey ?

I'd be amazed if we hadn't met up sometime. I went through various phases at the Bridge, roughly Shed central, North Stand, White Wall and sometimes sitting in the West Stand. You asked something similar in reply to my intro message, which I managed to put in the wrong section, but still. I knew a lot of people back then. More faces than names, but from that lot, I remember Charlie Hunter from Southall who used to run a coach - from Greenford Hall? Then there was Chris, I think he was from Greenford, Vaughney from South Ruislip, Dave & Mark Woodhouse. I did drink in the King's Head, but also in the White Hart (or was it the White Horse?) over the road, at a time when this Irish bloke was the landlord. After the place got smashed up one time, he'd be on the door with his alsatian on match days but he'd let me in. More regularly, in "later" years, I used to drink in the Jolly Maltsters near the top of North End Road, but often ended up in the Weavers, down Farm Lane from the Maltsters.

Back to the chants again ... I really hoped someone would pick up on my reference to Mickey Greenaway ... ZIGGAAAAAAAAAA ZAGGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

lest we forget.

 

[Scott]

The famous Tottenham Hotspur went to Rome to see The Pope

The famous Tottenham Hotspur went to Rome to see The Pope

The famous Tottenham Hotspur went to Rome to see The Pope

And this is what he said:

f**k off!!!

or

Chim chimeny, chim chimeny, chim chim chereu

We hate those bar stewards in claret and blue

Might have to bring that one tomorrow.

 

[mad_mac]

Greenway the ma with the staircase Nose!!

Oi OI OI!!!

Up here north of the border the sectarianism is still evident, just not as much at the grounds now, but both sides have some amazing/terrifying songs

As for us, I like Liverpool slums too

In your liverpool slums

In your liverpool slums

your mum's on the game

and your dad's in the nick

you can't get a job

coz your too f*cking thick

In your liverpool slums

Who's that team they call the Chelsea, who's that team we all adore

we're the boys in blue and white and we'll fight with all our might

and we're gonna show the football world how to score

Bring on the tottenham or the arsenal, bring on the scoucers by the score

Barcelona real madrid

Tottenham are a bunch of y*ds

Also, remember singing "we can see you both sneaking out" to a couple players elaving early doors at some games, and one that I thought was hilarous, though wasn't there (someone may remember this if I describe it right, and may be able to tell what game)

Anyway, I think we were playing in Europe, and the opposition score a goal, well so they though. Think it was chalked off for offside, but the ball was in the net. well one of these away fans sets off a flare that billows smoke out all over the Bridge... a little premature in his celebrations.

So the Chelsea start singing, to teh tune of "Blue Moon"

"One Flare, you've only got One Flare, you've onnly got One Flare"

Also, talking about old songs not heard much, to the tune of west hams' blowing bubbles

"on a wolverhampton terrace, in the pouring rain

a young chelsea supporter got a bullet in his brain

and as he lay there dying, blood pouring from his head

he looked up to teh clear blue skies and this is what he said

YOU'RE GONNA GET YOU HEADS KICKED IN!"

Can anyone brush up the lyrics to that song, or vouch for it ever being sung recently? Think it is class

 

[BLUENUT]

Anyway, I think we were playing in Europe, and the opposition score a goal, well so they though. Think it was chalked off for offside, but the ball was in the net. well one of these away fans sets off a flare that billows smoke out all over the Bridge... a little premature in his celebrations. So the Chelsea start singing, to teh tune of "Blue Moon"

"One Flare, you've only got One Flare, you've onnly got One Flare"

I'm sure they scored afterward and we started singing, 'you should have saved you flare' - can't remember the opposition though.

 

[SydneyChelsea]

Carefree, wherever we may be

We don't give a toss 'bout history

We don't give a sh*t

We don't give a f**k

'Cause we're going home with the Euro Cup!

 

[Englishman]

His name is Tommy Baldwin

He's the leader of the team

Which team?

The finest football team the world has ever seen

We're the Fulham Road supporters and we're louder than the Kop

If anyone wants to argue, we'll do the f*ckin lot!

 

[just]

This one should get popular over the next couple of weeks. Sung to the stirring tune "Men of Harlech"

Craig Bellamy is a w*nker,

Shags his sister and his mother.

Craig Bellamy is a w*nker,

Fack off back to Wales.